This is a guest post by Kim Pearson, the mother of a transgender child, and Executive Director and co-founder of TransYouth Family Allies.
In her guest diary below, she describes her path to becoming a transgender youth advocate, and why she sees herself as belonging to the broader lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) community.
She also, from a diversity perspective, explains why she believes we those of us who are connected to the LGBT community should see ourselves as belonging to one broad, LGBT community. I believe this piece conveys a most wonderful message of hope.
~~Autumn~~
Why Do I Do What I Do?
By Kim Pearson
I have never really written a 'note' to share personal thoughts with 'the public' before, but then I have never experienced 'the public' sharing their personal thoughts with me in such a personal way before either.
 I am referring to the responses I am getting from my recently published article in 'Diversity Rules.' I don't know what it is that I said or how I may have said things differently than so many other times, but the response is clearly different.
This is a portion of what the mother of a transgender child said to her husband while reading the article which she then shared with me:
"How could she have done such a marvelous job in this interview, shedding such insight into the lives of a transgender child when she isn't one?! I'm so, so, so impressed with her work." And "How is she going to know how profoundly moved I am..."
Another note I received simply stated:
"You are inspiring"
The one that caused me to cry the most was the one from a gay man who saw glimpses of himself and his life in the article:
"I saw myself in many of your answers...I didn't realize it then, but I knew as a child I was different, felt different, but couldn't give that difference a name...because I had an attraction to men. An attraction that I had to forever keep locked up deep inside of me. It was a very confusing time riddled with guilt and shame, because if I had an attraction to men, and that was sinful I had been told. But such an attraction meant then I must be female, because only women are attracted to men, but here I was in a little boy's body."
So back to the title of this note, "Why I do, What I do?" When I was asked this question earlier this week I responded: "Because I have a transgender child."
I now realize that there has been a fundamental shift within me and that my child and those like him are no longer the sole focus of the work I'm doing. The work and I have evolved.
I have always known GLBT folks and had friends in the community. I must admit that not until my child brought me in as a member of this community did I fully understand its diversity. What I have also came to understand is that much of the community seems to be at odds with others in the community. Many times I experience a sense of the LGB feeling separate and very different from the T which honestly puzzles me. When I hear the stories from the LGB of their childhood experiences, many of them are interchangeable with the childhood experiences of the T. The stories revolve around words like different, ashamed, sad, guilty, lonely, isolated, ridiculed, and bullied...the list is endless really. The point is, if you feel that any or all of those words apply to your childhood experience then you have firsthand knowledge of what it is to be transgender. That is the bond that the LGB has with the T, shared experience.
So my answer today to "Why I do What I do?" is simply this:
To create understanding, to build bridges, to shine light on the fact that we, the inhabitants of this planet and this community, are much more alike than we are different.
E.E. Cummings:
It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.
Kim Pearson:
Summon your courage and surround yourself with courageous allies and walk with your head held high. We are all amazing...let the light of who you are shine brightly for all to see and from that, compassion and understanding will grow. |
