Winger pundit: gays in the military is like me in a platoon with Hooters waitresses

yea, guess he forgot that point....

He also forgot some of history as well.

http://EQFL.org

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by: banshiii @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 09:40:36 AM CDT

Well...

"Is this man not in control of his sexual desires?"

How many of those making a living - directly or indirectly - off of pushing the agenda of an Administration that believes the insanity of 'abstinence education works' actually are?

Kat

>^..^<

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by: KatRose @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 09:40:46 AM CDT

I remain astounded at the ignorance...

....although I don't know why it should surprise me anymore.

When I was in the Army, there were certainly guys in my unit I thought were hot.  But there were at least twice as many that I didn't.  Of course, idiots like Smith think gay men want to f*ck every male they see.

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by: SuburbanHomo @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 09:44:33 AM CDT

Smith:

"To me, putting openly gay people in the military is a social experiment. And now is not the time for it."

A similar thing was said back in Birmingham in 1955.

The tragic truth is that it never feels like it's THE TIME to induce change.

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by: Holly Capote @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 10:02:02 AM CDT

Hooters girls he says,

  This just shows were this guys mind is at.  Lunch time for some oogling, with a few wingers.

If I make sense? it was quite by accident.

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by: HappyCat @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 10:02:21 AM CDT

As a straight man, I would find it extremely difficult to work with beautiful women

without having a perpetual stiffy. As an actively interested heterosexual male, it's extremely difficult not to feel that way; I don't care what people say about self-control.

I think in reality, though, a better comparison would be a straight man working in a group of a random segment of women; most would look average, (although average for 22 year olds is pretty good) some really hot, and some not so much. So I think one's wee wee could interfere with concentration a bit of the time, yes.

If gays have the same libido, I would imagine it would be difficult for them at times as well, but I really don't know.

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by: Josh @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 14:27:39 PM CDT

[ Parent ]

That's your problem, not mine

As a straight man, I would find it extremely difficult to work with beautiful women without having a perpetual stiffy. As an actively interested heterosexual male, it's extremely difficult not to feel that way; I don't care what people say about self-control.

Do you walk around all day with a hard-on? Are you really unable to be around a woman that you find attractive without immediately wanting to fuck her? Have you considered therapy, or medication for this debilitating condition, or do you honestly think that other people should be responsible for your inability to control your dick?

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by: Darkrose @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 14:56:11 PM CDT

[ Parent ]

I believe the premise was being surrounded 24/7 with nothing but beautiful women.

The world isn't like that, so no, I don't have the problem you are trying to assign. How would you react if you were surrounded by Chippendales 24/7?

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by: Josh @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 15:01:43 PM CDT

[ Parent ]

...

The world isn't like that, so no, I don't have the problem you are trying to assign. How would you react if you were surrounded by Chippendales 24/7?

Since I don't find those guys at all attractive, I wouldn't care. If I was surrounded by guys who looked like Viggo Mortensen, Sean Bean, Liam Neeson, Jason Isaacs, or David Hewlett; or women who looked like Gina Torres, Carrie-Anne Moss, Rachel Lutrell or Naomi Harris, I'd think, "Wow, she/he's hot," and then I'd go on about my business. See, I've actually worked with people I've found attractive, and somehow, I've always been able to manage to stop myself from staring long enough to actually do my job. It's called being a mature adult.

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by: Darkrose @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 16:06:52 PM CDT

[ Parent ]

That's OK. Some folks don't have a high libido.

To each his own. I have read where high-achieving men have very high sexual energy, but that's another topic.

Also, thinking something and doing something about it are two. different things. I'm not saying I couldn't do my job, but being surrounded by great-looking women would be a distraction.

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by: Josh @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 16:41:15 PM CDT

[ Parent ]

And again...

Being distracted by great-looking women is your problem, not theirs. Or are you actually suggesting that gays and lesbians shouldn't serve in the military because they would be too distracted to do their job? Because not only is that stupid, it's assuming that everyone is as horny and unable to deal with it as you claim to be.

And yes, I'm pissed off. I just read about a 17-year-old girl who was gang-raped in front of at least three witnesses and whose first words were "I'm sorry." One of the eight men in the room replied, "She did this to herself." The idea that equality is impossible because men can't control their dicks isn't going over well with me right now.

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by: Darkrose @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 19:38:27 PM CDT

[ Parent ]

Pretty defensive here. Not sure why.

I am trying my very best to be civil, but you are pushing. I never said it was women's damn problem if I'm distracted. I also said I had no idea how gays react in groups of people they find attractive, so please don't try to assign beliefs to me I do not have.

Nobody is fucking talking about men controlling their dicks. I already fucking said I would be distracted by beautiful women but thought I could still do by job. The problem you are having is all YOURS. Go talk over your distress with your therapist instead of lashing out at innocents. Got it?

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by: Josh @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 21:45:16 PM CDT

[ Parent ]

Excuse me?

I think in reality, though, a better comparison would be a straight man working in a group of a random segment of women; most would look average, (although average for 22 year olds is pretty good) some really hot, and some not so much. So I think one's wee wee could interfere with concentration a bit of the time, yes.

If gays have the same libido, I would imagine it would be difficult for them at times as well, but I really don't know.

You did type that, didn't you?

And that little snide bit about me and my therapist? Go fuck yourself with that "wee wee" that YOU SAID would be in a "perpetual stiffy" from working with beautiful women.

As a straight man, I would find it extremely difficult to work with beautiful women

without having a perpetual stiffy. As an actively interested heterosexual male, it's extremely difficult not to feel that way; I don't care what people say about self-control.

I don't think I'm the one who needs to see my therapist.

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by: Darkrose @ Fri Jun 01, 2007 at 02:04:25 AM CDT

[ Parent ]

I give up.

Yes, I said difficult, but I also said several fucking times that I could do the job, nevertheless. Reread the  post you cited. It says the same fucking thing. Is reading comprehension a casualty of your myopia?

Now please go see your goddamn shrink and leave me out of your crisis. Thanks.

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by: Josh @ Fri Jun 01, 2007 at 07:01:27 AM CDT

[ Parent ]

Oh, and if that was you being civil?

You might want to work on that. Maybe see your fucking therapist.

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by: Darkrose @ Fri Jun 01, 2007 at 02:05:56 AM CDT

[ Parent ]

You got what you gave.

Jesus Christ. I tried in my first two posts with you to be civil. But my policy, as always, is to be nice first, but if the other person persists in being an asshole, well, I just don't take any shit.  So you got what you asked for

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by: Josh @ Fri Jun 01, 2007 at 07:04:48 AM CDT

[ Parent ]

This space intentionally left blank so you can have the last word.

.

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by: Darkrose @ Fri Jun 01, 2007 at 14:21:25 PM CDT

[ Parent ]

I think he does it on purpose, Darkrose

He starts out with something that sounds like an attempt to be tolerant and open-minded, but contains a core assumption that is nonsensical and offensive. That is the bait. When you call him on it you are just giving him an excuse to turn it into a verbal slugfest, with him ratcheting up the rhetoric each time but claiming that you started it.

Of course the implication was that since he gets distracted by beautiful women, it is therefore legitimate to say that gay people can't perform adequately in the military. Why else would his erectile issues even make sense in this thread? The thing is that he is not trying to debate that point, just get a rise out of you. Don't let him.

What the hell was I doing in Oaxaca in 1992, on the eve of the Zapatista revolution?

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by: Cambridge Kid @ Fri Jun 01, 2007 at 07:51:20 AM CDT

[ Parent ]

Yeah, my bad.

I started out with the assumption that he was being clueless rather than deliberately being a shit. Clearly, I was wrong.

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by: Darkrose @ Fri Jun 01, 2007 at 14:22:32 PM CDT

[ Parent ]

I think you'd be surprised...

how quickly you get used to it. I change and shower in the locker room at my gym every day, and I don't get all excited...even when I have to share a bench with the dude who feels it's absolutely necessary to put his foot up on the bench to dry his junk while I'm bent over tying my shoes--my face being a whole foot from his nasty old package. Eww.

Trust me, straight dudes out there in the generic locker room. It's really hot for us queers as a concept/dreams/porn, but in reality, it's not really hot at all in practice.

(Talking about generic gyms, not THOSE gyms or the other kind like Results--don't go to those since I actually would like to exercise)

Anyway, that's mine and a few other gays I exercise with...your results may vary.

Curses! My million dollar ideas foiled again: "God Bless Your Brand!" http://www.christvertising.com/

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by: TJ McFisty @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 15:02:22 PM CDT

[ Parent ]

The Hooters Platoon

First of all, where do I enlist for that duty?  Platoon sergeant for an all-Hooters girls platoon?  Hmm... I wonder what the mission would be; emergency floatation devices for crossing the Tigris?  Abaya quality assurance testers ("If this abaya makes Heather from West Palm look un-sexy, imagine what it can do for you!")?  Debate training and language lessons for the Commander in Chief?

Second, many others have shot this down, but let me consider it.  I'm in an urban civil war zone.  Bullets are flying by.  Two of my Hooters platoon have been cut down by a sniper, which followed after our Humvee was blown up by an IED, killing my driver, Heather, Hooters' last calendar girl of the month, who, despite seeing her entrails now on the outside of her body, is still a Playmate-level knockout: ice blue eyes, flowing blonde mane, full womanly C-cup breasteses, and unbelievably long legs (the girl has... er, had... a 40-inch inseam!).  And now we're in this ambush.

Jennifer, a stunning 5'8" green-eyed 36DD-26-37 brunette from Oak Park is to my left trying to raise HQ on the radio.  Staci-with-an-"I" from Anaheim is firing the M60 machine gun at the suspected sniper position, sweat glistening on her mahogany skin and running down a little rivulet created by the cleavage of her heaving-yet-champagne-cup-sized breasteses.  Stacy-with-a-"Y" from Seattle is to my right, crouching down in a futile attempt to save Heather, showing off her unparalleled Latina badonk-a-donk ass that narrows to her impossibly small waist.  And Kim-Song, my perky Asian squad leader, is screaming at me, wanting to know the next orders, her porcelain skin framing a perfectly symmetrical face and almond-shaped deep brown eyes, ruby red lips yelling words I cannot hear for I can only just stare, mesmerized, imagining the thrills we could achieve if only I could get her lipstick stains on the fly of my tighty-whiteys.

Man, I really really want to just pay attention to the mission and fight back against those insurgents, but I just can't stop thinking about fucking my whole platoon!  This would be a lot easier if the girls didn't insist on forgoing the desert BDUs, helmets, and body armor for their familiar orange hot pants and tank tops.

The shots are getting closer.  Now Jennifer is hit.  I've gotta do something, but as a straight man surrounded by impossibly hot women, I'm as helpless as a kitten tempted by yarn.  I do what any normal heterosexual man would do in the same situation: I drop trou and furiously spank one out.

See?  That's why we can't have gay guys in the military.  Because, of course, every guy in the military is impossibly hot to gay guys, even the over 40, slightly retarded, drug addicted, criminally convicted, bottom of the gene pool recruits we'll accept these days, even under helmets, body armor, and the most unflattering clothing one can imagine.

I hope this clears everything up.

"If people let government decide which foods they eat and medicines they take, their bodies will soon be in as sorry a state as are the souls of those who live under tyranny." -- Thomas Jefferson

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by: RadicalRuss @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 20:02:14 PM CDT

[ Parent ]

That was a lot of work for nothing, wasn't it?

Coz I never said gays shouldn't be in the military, did I? I said I was curious how gays might feel in that situation since I am not one and don't know.

Doh.

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by: Josh @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 21:51:23 PM CDT

[ Parent ]

OMG....

...That was a RIOT, Russ.

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by: SuburbanHomo @ Fri Jun 01, 2007 at 08:29:48 AM CDT

[ Parent ]

Copyright notice coming

Watch out Pam - remember my graphic for the "Hooters Vegan"?  I predict you'll be getting a cease-and-desist letter soon - those Hooters people are touchy!

"If people let government decide which foods they eat and medicines they take, their bodies will soon be in as sorry a state as are the souls of those who live under tyranny." -- Thomas Jefferson

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by: RadicalRuss @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 19:38:04 PM CDT

[ Parent ]

i'm guessing the hooters waitresses probably wouldn't reciprocate

but that's not something that seems to concern mark smith.  i assume he would consider it his right to stare and smirk or make lewd / suggestive comments, no matter how nonexistent the prospect of actually getting any action from one of the women would be.  deep down, perverts like him think she secretly likes it. 

it's interesting and telling that he would uphold an analogy of hooters waitresses anyway--women who are meant to be admired solely for their physical attributes.  gay men don't objectify in the same way that pigs like smith do, and they certainly don't view every attractive man's ass as their personal right.

The gays stole my lunch money

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by: matt in mpls @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 10:03:02 AM CDT

And of course most men in a platoon would not reciprocate if it were a gay man

simply because most men are straight. This is not an insult; this is just the natural condition. But the fact on nonreciprocation wouldn't prevent a straight man from getting horny around buxom pretty babes.

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by: Josh @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 14:21:23 PM CDT

[ Parent ]

That Hooters girl image is the typical tits on a stick.

Boy hips and fake breasts. 

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by: Holly Capote @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 10:23:43 AM CDT

I told them not to use that picture. LOL

If I make sense? it was quite by accident.

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by: HappyCat @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 10:30:32 AM CDT

[ Parent ]

Tits on a stick?!?

Damn, and I thought I liked corn dogs!

"If people let government decide which foods they eat and medicines they take, their bodies will soon be in as sorry a state as are the souls of those who live under tyranny." -- Thomas Jefferson

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by: RadicalRuss @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 19:38:44 PM CDT

[ Parent ]

Sounds like to me he is fantasizing

about getting down in the fox hole with a big orgie of men.

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by: Pta @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 10:39:38 AM CDT

Yeah, why is it

that the loudest homophobes always have the most cardboard cutout ideas about what straight men fantasize about?

If I were in a trench with... Hooters girls... who had REALLY big... um, boobs... that felt just like... sandbags... cuz I'm STRAIGHT. I mean, really, REALLY straight. One hundred per - I wouldn't even see the bullets I would be looking at the boobs so much! That is probably how gay guys would be... I assume, because I don't know.

What the hell was I doing in Oaxaca in 1992, on the eve of the Zapatista revolution?

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by: Cambridge Kid @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 10:47:18 AM CDT

[ Parent ]

Insult to our military

The British have allowed out gays in their military since 2000. In the seven years since there hasn't been a problem, in combat or not. Why doesn't someone ask the supporters of DADT why they feel that our troops cannot behave as professionally and maturely as the Brits, our biggest war time ally?

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by: HPRIC @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 10:46:04 AM CDT

Another thing that they forget

There are women in a lot of these units, they aren't men only.  I don't know what it's like in the military but when I have been out in the field doing research people just tended to bond together in smaller groups.  It wasn't unusual to have coed tents, it was a group of friends.  Sure, there was some naughtiness going on with some people but most of us were mature enough to realize that it wasn't our business, it was up to the people who were actually involved.  We live in a country of 12 year olds.
By the way, this guy was on C-Span talking about activist judges this past weekend.  He looks like he's coated with at least three layers of slime, these photos don't do that justice.  You need to see his smirky plastic-looking face in action to appreciate this, I couldn't find anything on youtube.  I think that I would qualify him as a mercy fuck too. 
 

My America includes LGBT families.

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by: Mena @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 10:56:44 AM CDT

Yeah, I usually ask

why these chicken hawk wingnuts don't go and enlist themselves, since they are so gung-ho for war. Considering his attitude toward the women he would serve with, however, I think that he has made the right choice. Our troops have suffered enough.

What the hell was I doing in Oaxaca in 1992, on the eve of the Zapatista revolution?

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by: Cambridge Kid @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 11:00:25 AM CDT

[ Parent ]

Don't talk about stuff

you don't know a damned thing about!  Oh, wait - I forgot that he's an expert because he's on god's side: the GOP.  Having been in the military, I could tell this asshat that when your ass is being shot at by people who want you dead, you don't give a great big damn about the sexuality or gender of the person next to you, as long as they're covering you and shooting back.

Personally, I think he's a closet tranny - what with the Hooters example and all.

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by: Jami @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 11:15:03 AM CDT

Air Force Veteran in Virginia

Having been in the Air Force and a veteran of the Persian Gulf War, I have to say this is pure ignorance.

Funny that you might "worry" about gay men being attracted to "straight" men in shared units but no one ever expresses "worry" about women serving with any similar issue. Why? Because everyone knows that when men and or women go on "tours of duty" whether war related or not, there is a great deal of infidelity and inside sex going on. Gay indiscretions must be firmly private for both the straight man as well as the gay one, yet they still occur with good frequency. Lest we forget the ratio of women to men in the military in general...and are we all subscribing to the Fairy Tale ideal that these men who have been on long tours away from home have gone without physical sex all of this time??? Im sure there are VERY few Iraqi women choices, given their religious viewpoints, so whom does that leave? .... other men.... and then we are back to another idea of "If you blow me and I dont do anything back, then Im not gay".

America needs to grow up already.

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by: zbriboy8 @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 12:20:00 PM CDT

As usual

its always the ugly one with zits on their ass that are soooooooo afraid that the (gasp) gays in the military may try to molest them. As if.............

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by: stacheman @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 12:24:10 PM CDT

...

As a gay friend said to a rather jumpy acquaintance once when confronted with the "are you staring at my ass?" comment:

"Don't flatter yourself"

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by: Grog @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 12:27:11 PM CDT

Or...

In a similar situation with a Gomer who was making dummy jokey comments about guys always checking his butt out, I told him:

"You should double-check that it's not concern that your momma didn't teach you that yer belt goes over your big gut. It's either that or your crappy shoes are worn down in the heel."

Curses! My million dollar ideas foiled again: "God Bless Your Brand!" http://www.christvertising.com/

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by: TJ McFisty @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 15:09:58 PM CDT

[ Parent ]

Lowering Standards?????

I saw the CNN interview and one thing he brought out as his "argument" was he didn't think that the army should be conducting social experiments during a time of war.

Well how about the following "social experiments":
1. Raising enlistment age to 42
2. Lowering standards by allowing those convicted of "minor" felonies to enlist. Such "minor" felonies include, drug use, conviction for underage drinking
3. The Army also is shifting the student load from ROTC programs and West Point to the officer school. (In other words, younger less experienced officers are being rushed into service)

And he's worried about gays serving openly?  Sounds to me that he is more afraid of HIS hidden orientation being revealed in the shower stalls rather than being hit on.

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by: jerzyguy @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 15:55:57 PM CDT

"Social experiment"

is a dog-whistle phrase; it's precisely the phrase that was used by those who opposed the racial integration of the military and those who opposed allowing women in. It's intended for those who think that those decisions were mistakes.

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by: ebohlman @ Sun Jun 03, 2007 at 10:20:01 AM CDT

[ Parent ]

I'm really starting to resent these people

Where the hell do these perverts get off saying I can't control my behavior? Just because they can't keep their hands to themselves in a crappy boobie bar doesn't mean I can't keep my dick in my pants when I'm around other guys!

Despite some entertaining fantasies to the contrary, I am not a damn sex fiend looking for the perfect porno scene!

I'm really beginning to think that this bigotry is all about straight guys being afraid that they might get looked at by gay men the same way they (straight guys) look at women.

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by: Ferin @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 16:41:27 PM CDT

Yep.

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by: Holly Capote @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 16:46:20 PM CDT

[ Parent ]

Nailed it.

It's power, not sex.  The objectifier has power over the object.  To be objectified is to surrender power.

It's also about het pride - the idea that "I'm so straight it's obvious!" - so that if a gay guy did stare, one's convictions regarding one's projected straightness would be suspect.

I seem to find that (aside from the severe abuse victims) most straight or allegedly straight guys who have the biggest homophobia issues are the ones who would more likely be initially perceived as gay.  For example, a small, slight fellow, or a big "bear-ish" fellow, or a dude with little ability to grow facial hair, or a guy who's homely, or a guy who's shy or calm or non-violent or bookish or anything else not considered "manly".

Most of us well-adjusted straight guys, if hit upon by a gay man, look at it as just a mistake at worst ("Sorry, dude, I'm straight.") or a compliment at best ("Wow, I'm considered physically appealing!").  Count me in the latter group.  In fact, I find gay compliments on looks to be a better barometer of physical beauty because women don't tend to grade male beauty as consistently or give it as much weight.  Hell, Lemmy Kilmeister from Motorhead gets hot chicks, and he's no looker!  If one woman tells you you're good looking, her friend may disagree completely and think you're downright ugly.  But men - gay or straight in my experience - seem to have better consistency in their beauty evaluations.  We might think a woman (or dude) is super hot, whereas our friend would say, "yeah, she's (he's) pretty good looking, but not super hot."

Sorry, gotta run.  I'm overdrawn in my gross generalizations account.

"If people let government decide which foods they eat and medicines they take, their bodies will soon be in as sorry a state as are the souls of those who live under tyranny." -- Thomas Jefferson

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by: RadicalRuss @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 20:17:04 PM CDT

[ Parent ]

Talk about distracting...

My friend came up with this novel concept: "Sorry Mr. Straight Soldier, I can't think about how much I want to do you because people are shooting at me, and it's kinda distracting."

Sheesh.

Girls, Lisa. Boys kiss girls.

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by: That Queer Chick @ Thu May 31, 2007 at 18:59:42 PM CDT